5150Surfer

First I am being Laid Off from my Job
I have 2 weeks left. This really sucks. My wife is being really supportive but I am a wreak.
I have lost 10 lbs, can't sleep at night, I then just lay there tossing and turning. I do ok when I stay busy but in the afternoons or evenings it gets quiet and all I seem to do is feel sorry for myself ( not good I know ).
With 2 weeks of work left I am still trying to apply for internal jobs but the reality of not working is scaring me. Not that I love to work but the rewards are good and so is the income.  A good friend of mine says " work is a four letter word and they have to pay you to do it". All of my future plans hinge on staying with the company I am with and retiring from there. I have been there since 1998, have never been written-up and have done a pretty good job. They have been reducing the ranks for the past 4 years and I guess it's my turn. All of the marginal workers were let go years ago. We are down to the meat. If I can stay 4 more years I will have a good pension and have a good retirement without too many financial issues. I Hope

I guess one issue if not the biggest is WHAT DO I DO on my first day home.  I know you will all say Go to the Beach have a day to yourself, have fun bla bla bla.  I am afraid of that day, I don't want that day come.

I pray for a miracle and I can stay employed.  I have been praying and so has my family and friends.
I know God has a plan and I just can't see it

Anyway thanks for reading. I just needed to get this off my chest.   I will update as time goes on. I hope I can look back at this and say  WHAT WERE YOU SO WORRIED ABOUT

God Bless